How Your Binge Eating is Protecting You
Binging is not bad. Our habits and patterns around food are often guiding us toward deeper needs and desires. So this behavior is not something to be ashamed of. If you have experienced binging in the past or if it’s something you’re experiencing now, it is not a reflection of who you are or your character. It is a message from yourself to yourself. Binge eating is often characterized by consuming a large amount of food in one sitting and a feeling that the behavior of eating is out of control. An individual can binge on anything. A binge can even include a sense of overeating on foods you have labeled as “healthy” with a feeling of being out of control.
We can learn from these experiences with food and they can reveal to us our own resiliency. Your binging is trying to help you get through some situation that does not feel nourishing and satiating. Your binging can actually be a sign of your strength that you’re doing the best you can to navigate an intense life circumstance. You are doing what you need to do to get through whatever is occurring. Binging can be a way that you’re striving to feel connected, grounded, relaxed, alive, and in control. Marc David, the founder of The Institute for the Psychology of Eating, says that binging has a lot of power to it. So you engaging in the act of binging can be a misguided attempt to step into how powerful, resilient, and strong you are. The situation and thus the binging will eventually subside.
So while you’re flowing with whatever is arising in your life internally and externally, here are some different ways we can approach binging behavior.
Ritualize Your Binge: Explore if there is a time of day you find yourself engaging in your binge. When that time of day comes, put whatever food you want to eat on your favorite plate, sit down with that food, and eat it without any distractions. When we slow down with our food, we can notice the tastes, textures, and what we are receiving from that food. You can embrace the grounding and pleasure and relaxation it is providing. When we take away labels that we are doing something “wrong” or “bad” we put the power back in ourselves and less in the food where the food and thus the binging become less desirable to engage in. Remember that you are never ever doing anything “wrong.” In taking away the judgment, you may find the binging dissipates on its own.
Urge Surfing: When the urge to reach for food arises, you can observe that urge without acting on it, numbing out to it, or trying to make it go away. You can get curious what some part of you believes you will receive from eating whatever food you’re thinking of eating and then explore if there is some other action you can engage in that would provide you with the sensations and emotions you’re looking to feel.
Journal: Writing is supportive in so many different ways. We get the physical act of moving by writing and our hand gliding over a piece of paper and we give ourselves space to express what our body has been holding on to. Journaling does not have to look any particular way. It doesn’t even need to be in full sentences. You can write out a list of words that resonate with you in that moment. You can write poetry. You can write a letter to someone that you don’t send. There are emotions desiring to be seen, and heard, and held. The binging is coming in as a way to try and navigate those emotions. Journaling can offer the opportunity to process your emotions in a way that can feel more satiating long term.
The thing about binging is that it may feel good in the moment, but everything the binging is trying to numb you out to is still going to be there after the behavior is over. Even if you experiment with all of these tools and the binge still happens, explore some ways to still express what was trying to come up. Our life situations may take a while to shift and change. What is within our own control is how we respond to them. The binging will still continue to occur until we slow down and be with our emotions and reactions with compassion.
Remember to send yourself so much loving kindness on this journey. You are always doing the best you can to take care of you. Let yourself know that you’re doing a pretty damn good job.